Unfortunately, it often seems that we as humans are programmed to only really “get the message” when it smacks us right in the face. Do you find that to be true?
I lived the most self-absorbed, ignorant life until my brother was diagnosed with cancer. It took that reality check to open my eyes and realize that there are more important things in this world than what shoes you’re wearing or how thin you are. Since that whole experience back in 2013, I’ve changed a lot, mostly for the better (in my humble opinion!). Unfortunately, it took the most horrific experience of our lives to incite that change.
The past couple of weeks have been tough, and now that they’re over, I guess I’m finding myself deep in thought again. How did I get to this point? What’s really important? How can I make sure that I never get to this point again?
It all started with (what I think was) a rough case of food poisoning.
Sweet land of the living, is there anything worse than food poisoning? It’s kind of funny when you really think about what’s going on (your body just EXPELLING everything it’s got in an effort to get whatever bug out), but NOT funny at all while it’s going on.
The week in general had been a really rough one. I had been exhausted (partially from the time change, partially just from having way too much on the go all at once), and it was starting to show. I was irritable, snapping at people for no reason, complaining, picking fights where they don’t need to be had.
Yea, I’m a peach.
It turns out that everyone has their breaking point, and I reached mine that week. I woke up on the Friday morning feeling just awful. Dizzy, nauseous, pain in my stomach. I went to work with the intention of sticking it out as long as I could and then bringing my laptop home when I couldn’t take it anymore. That didn’t last long.
I ended up back at home by 1pm where thank goodness Matt was still around the house before leaving for the rest of the weekend to go up to his family maple syrup bush. Long story short, I ended up puking so violently and so much that I passed out cold and banged my head good in the bathroom, came to, and then passed out a SECOND time in the bathroom.
I then got to take my first ever ambulance ride to the hospital, where they basically told me that I was struggling with extreme dehydration, hooked me up to a bunch of fluids and sent me on my way after a couple of hours.
I woke up feeling better, not 100%, but much better than I was the day before. It took another 4 days, another doctor’s visit and an ultrasound appointment before I finally started to feel like myself again. The entire time, I was so frustrated that I couldn’t be up and about getting things done. The ironic part of course is that I think that’s the lesson that this whole episode was trying to smack me in the face with.
I love living my life at 300 miles an hour; it’s the only way that I’ve ever known how to live. I love feeling productive and like I get a lot done in a day, but lately it’s all been feeling a little bit overwhelming. I’m short-tempered. I complain a lot. Little things that shouldn’t get to me are irritating and pushing my buttons big time. And it’s not fair to those around me.
Perhaps the thing that’s made me the most sad about the pace of things lately is that I’m finding that I don’t set and achieve goals anymore. For years on this blog I preached about goal setting, weekly, monthly, daily, BHAGs…I can honestly say to you that as of right now, I can’t even remember the last goal that I set and worked towards achieving. I think that this piece of my life that’s been missing has been a big part of the reason that I’m feeling a bit stalled, a bit demotivated and overall, a bit frustrated.
So all of that is going to change. Starting right…..
My dream since I was able to hold a pencil was to publish a novel. Have I ever shared that with you guys before? I’ve written stories, novels, journals, articles, you name it, since the time I was 3 years old. The only problem was that I was petrified to let anyone read my writing. It’s for that reason that I still have only shared this blog link with 6 (yes, the number that comes after 5) people that I know.
While I would love to set the goal to start working on a novel right now, I can honestly say that I don’t have the inspiration for a compelling story……yet. I find writing for the sake of writing (when it comes to fiction) is tough, and I haven’t had much success when trying to force a story to come to life. Some of the best work that I’ve done has been when I was deeply passionate about the story, the characters and when I had the inspiration to keep going.
SO, in the spirit of hopefully sparking some inspiration, getting me writing consistently and reviving my blog, today (Friday April 8th), I officially kick-off….
The 30 Day Writing Challenge
Sara, what’s this? You ask? Simple! I will be completing each of the writing exercises listed below for the next 30 days:
Cool, hey? Any fellow bloggers, story-tellers, BHAGers or disillusioned goal setters…if you’re looking for some inspiration, then feel free to join in! I’ll kick-off the challenge tonight with the first day’s topic: list 10 things that make you really happy.
So let’s write! We’ve got 30 days!
Have a wonderful weekend, see you tonight!
One thought on “Reality Check and a New Goal”